I throw my fits between the first and second watches
While they're changing guard.
I need the signals to go all the way through my corpus callosum
To the other side of my brain.
I need them to know about you
And what you've done to me,

How you've burned me with your cigarettes,
Mocked me when I coughed and cried,
Sided with my abusive boyfriends.
You marauded across my brain,
Strewing your mind mines
Until I can't even decide what I should wear today
For trying to please you.

I want my left hand to know
What my right hand has been through,
So it will train in mastery of its weapon,
So its slings will find their arrows true,
And even the memory of you
Will be shattered from my mirror
And my life, once, and for all.

-jenn