Someone wants to do my makeup.

Someone wants to do my hair.

Someone wants to do me,

Right here, in an armchair at the dentist's office.

I'm going to go home and clean my own teeth.

I've been trained, I know how.

I can follow proper procedure

When it comes to my oral care.

And if my hair's a mess,

The wind will fix it,

And the sun will make me sweat,

And my face will be better because of it,

And my love life?  Is no one's business, anyhow.

-jenn