The Sun is watching youtube videos
These days to learn to highlight
The girls hair better.
He's got to compete with snobby stylists everywhere,
Who say they know The Way.

And with so many afraid of Him,
For he's been labeled a carcinogen,
He shakes his mighty head until
Even his sunspots quake.
"Have they never read the ingredients
In those awful sunscreens they slather on their skin?"
He booms incredulously.

But how can He compete with tanning beds,
Manicured feet, and stylists,
The snobby ones, indeed,
Who take up a brush and smelly oils
And the most alchemical of chemicals
That change lead hair to gold?

But He sticks to His catechism,
His articles of faith of His religion require
That he give the people what they clamor for,
And there is no clause "as long as."
He will even give you Barabbas
If what you want is that much beneath
The Truth that you deserve.

For he's a live and let live kind of guy
And watches quietly from the sky
And sees all of the people everywhere
Doing just exactly what they want to do
As far as they know.

-jenn